DIY dishwasher indicator
I've had this clean/dirty indicator in my home for a few years. It's on the wall, above the dishwasher, and it works as a very helpful tool to remind us whether the dishes are presently dirty and awaiting a wash cycle or clean and ready to put away. Guests who notice it always comment and are then further intrigued when I tell them that the lovely lady on the right is based on a true story. Here's the story: While visiting my cousin in Italy during the summer of 2001 she told me about a strip club near her house. "It's totally weird," she said, "the Italians have a different... ummm... looser attitude about sex." She starts to tell me about a stripper she saw last month who was just gorgeous. "She came onto the stage and danced around a bit, then started to take off her clothes." Alright this sounds normal, I'm thinking, I've seen American strippers do this too. "Then she gets down on her hands and knees, lights two candles and sticks one up her ass and one in her cooch!" My cousin continues, "But that's not all, she spent the rest of her act crawling around the edge of the stage, lighting cigarettes for the front row."
I never made it to that strip club. We were too busy doing other things on my vacation. But I still really wonder if that stripper had to be careful of what she ate the day before her show. I'd hate to think of the burns if she made the mistake of eating a big fagioli (bean) salad for lunch.

Materials Needed

  • Mat board
    • white at least 13x11 inches
    • black at least 11x6 inches
  • Black photo tape, or any matte finish tape that is strong
  • mat knife
  • ruler
  • "Yes!" glue or a glue stick (anything that won't make the paper buckle)
  • Print out of the two files (candelabra and cleandirty)
  • 12 inches of fishing line
  • super glue or Magna Tak
  • thin masking tape (no thicker than 1/2" wide)

Steps


1. Download and print both files here:
Clean Dirty jpg file
Candelabra jpg file
2. Cut them out along the thin solid black lines.
3. Trace the pictures newly cut edges onto white mat board.
4. Cut the white mat board, each piece should be the same size as one of the pictures. Cut off the tabs from the top of the paper candelabra picture, cut along the dotted line. Now only the the mat board has two tabs on top.
5. Glue down the the paper to the mat board. For minimum risk of wrinkly paper use one of the glues listed and only apply glue to the outside inch or two of the mat board.
6.Trace the same dimentions of the large white piece (showing both nun and ass-candle) onto the piece of black mat board. This should measure 13x11" but trace just to be sure they're the same size.
7. Measure a boarder of 1/2 inch all around the inside of the black mat board, cut out the window leaving only that 1/2" border.
8.Apply black tape to the bottom of the black frame only. Line the inside center of the black tape with another thinner tape such as masking tape. Put both sticky sides together, this will prevent the center piece from sticking as it slides across.
9. Make a sandwich of your three pieces: Black frame on top, candelabra in the middle, and clean/dirty on the bottom. Secure the black tape from the bottom to the back leaving room between all the pieces for the center tab to move freely. Apply black tape around the edges of the two sides.
10. On the back of the bottom mat board tape down the ends of the fishing line approx 2" from the sides and 1" from the top. Glue down the ends using super glue/Magna tak or any other strong adhesive.
11. Allow everything to dry and hang proudly in your kitchen.